


Rebuilding the life we once knew

by Oncer597



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: Angst, F/F, Fluff, Temporary Amnesia
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-08
Updated: 2020-04-09
Packaged: 2021-03-02 00:47:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,179
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23546377
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Oncer597/pseuds/Oncer597
Summary: Charity had everything she'd ever wanted. A loving partner, her kids and a life that she was content with. What happens when all of that is ripped from under her by a car accident and she's suddenly back to August 2017.Vanessa is left to pick up the pieces and try to help her remember the life they've been living. Can she break down Charity's walls twice to gain back the relationship they had? Will she be able to persuade her that their relationship was real and had no anterior motive. But most importantly, will she be able to help Charity remember the life they have together?
Relationships: Charity Dingle/Vanessa Woodfield
Comments: 5
Kudos: 65





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I've had this idea for a while and thought I'd finally make it a reality. It's going to be fairly slowburn so bare with me! I promise it'll be worth it!

_'I will remember you, will you remember me?_  
_Don't let your life pass you by_  
_Weep not for the memories_  
_Remember the good times that we had?'_

All she knew was that there was a car accident, and Charity had been hurt. Badly. When she had heard that something had happened, her heart stopped. It was the same feeling as when she watched Lochlan’s dad drive off with Johnny. An all-encompassing fear that embodied her very being and left no room for any other emotions or thought. All she knew is that she had to get to Charity immediately.

Those are the thoughts that led Vanessa to speed down the road to the hospital. No considerations for speed limits or the law. However, the blatant ignorance for those factors was what allowed Vanessa to make the 30 minute drive in 15. She haphazardly parked and rushed into the hospital nearly taking out several people in the process.

She spotted the reception area and bolted over.

“Hi, I’m looking for Charity Dingle, she came in recently because of a car accident” she blurted to the lady sitting behind the desk. She looked up at Vanessa with a forced smile and started typing at her computer.

“She’s currently in A&E. There's a waiting area through that set of double doors on the left.” she pointed towards the door then instantly looked back at her computer.

Vanessa held her breath as she walked through the door. Around the corner, she was met with several Dingle faces. They were all either sitting staring at the floor or pacing back and forth in the small area. Cain sat in between Debbie and Moira, holding them both close. Debbie was clearly sobbing, whilst Cain was clearly only holding it together to keep face but the tears in his eyes were visible. Chas was pacing back and forth with Eve in her arms, letting silent tears roll down her face. Then there was Aaron sat in the corner being comforted by Robert with Liv sitting next to him.

The first person to notice Vanessa’s presence was Chas, instantaneously she handed Eve to Paddy who she didn't even realise was there and pulled Vanessa into her arms. As soon as she felt Chas’s arms around her she broke down, finally allowing the tears to escape from her eyes. It was like the dam had broken and she couldn't cease the salty water running from her eyes. She could hear Chas trying to comfort her, but the words were all merging and had no significance to her.

After a few minutes, she pulled away and wiped her eyes on her sleeve.

“Sorry about that” She murmured sheepishly whilst pointing at the obnoxious patch of wetness that had mascara wiped throughout it.

“I work in a pub and have a baby love, a few tears is hardly the worst thing I've had on my blouse,” Chas replied, trying to lift the blonde woman's spirits somewhat. Vanessa rewarded her with a small smile that she’d forced on her lips.

“Do you know what happened?” Vanessa finally got the courage to ask, not quite sure she wanted to know the answer.

“She was on the way back from picking up Noah-” Chas started.

“Wait, Noah is he okay? Where is he?” she continued to ramble on, blurting out every worry she had about him. Vanessa hadn't even spared a second thought about the young boy, in her haste she had completely forgotten that Charity had been picking up Noah from football.

“Vanessa calm down,” this time it was Debbie who had approached her and placed a comforting hand on her shoulder.

“He’s fine, well he’s broken his leg in three places and got a minor concussion, but he’s fine otherwise. Although I can say he was not happy about having to miss football until it's healed. He’s having x-rays as we speak.” Chas finished.

Relief flooded Vanessa’s being.

“She was on her way back but a drunk driver was speeding and ran a red, they hit the driver's side, sending the car spiralling. Charity managed to control the car enough to stop the passenger side from slamming into a wall but it meant that her side went into a lamp post.”

At that detail Vanessa playfully rolled her eyes, Charity doesn’t let many people see it, but she is so fiercely protective of her kids and this was a prime example of that.

“So she saved Noah from extra harm whilst in excruciating pain and caused herself more injury in the process, I don't care what anyone says that woman is amazing.”

The admiration in Vanessa’s eyes was very clear.

It was almost an hour later when a doctor approached the waiting room.

“Family of Charity Dingle?” He announced.

They all stood but it was Cain who spoke up.

“How is she?”

“She has a severe concussion, she’s broken her left collar bone and arm. She also had a bleed on the brain, which caused some swelling. So we're going to keep her in overnight to monitor that and make sure the swelling is going down and not progressing further. You can go see her now, but she's still waking up from the anaesthetic so she's groggy. Also only two people in the room at once, we don't want to overwhelm her.”

“Thank you, doctor,” Cain replied.

“ Wait do you know how Noah’s doing?” Vanessa asked.

“Ah yes we’ve just finished putting his leg in a cast”

“Can I go see him?” Vanessa questioned.

“Of course”

“Okay thanks” Vanessa turned to the Dingles standing behind her. “I’m going to go check on Noah make sure he’s okay and try to comfort him somewhat about Charity”

In the end, they decided that Debbie and Chas were going to see Charity first whilst Cain, Moira and Paddy sat in the waiting room. Vanessa, Robert, Aaron and Liv decided they were going to go see Noah.

“Shit, oh my god I was meant to pick Johnny and Moses up from the childminder 30 minutes ago. Crap.” Vanessa began to panic. She berated herself internally for forgetting about them.

“Hey, don't worry Ness. I’ll go get them, I’ll drop them with Rhona so you don't have to worry about them” Paddy volunteered.

“Oh god Paddy, you're a lifesaver.” Vanessa let out a breath of relief. At least she wouldn’t have to worry about the two horrors for a while.

“I’ll let Chas know where you’ve gone when she comes out,” Moira said. And with that, the small group headed over to the pediatric ward to go check on Noah.

They entered the room they were guided to and were met with a very annoyed looking Noah. As soon as he saw Vanessa walk in the room he looked somewhat happier.

“Ness please tell them to let me go” Noah pleaded straight away.

“Hi Noah, I’m glad you're feeling okay” Vanessa returned with sarcasm present in her voice, however, she was glad to see how quickly Noah had bounced back.

“I’ll see if we can get you out of here. But first, you need to know that your mum's okay. She's with Chas and Debbie and should be waking up soon. She's broken her arm and collar bone and hurt her head but she’ll be okay.”

The anxiety somewhat eased from his face.

“I’m going to go find a doctor and see if I can get you discharged, these clowns will stay with you” She smiled whilst pointing towards the Dingles.

“Oi” was collectively laughed by the three Dingles. Vanessa just smirked over her shoulder whilst walking out the room.

She returned to the room half an hour later to announce the good news to Noah.

“Right kid you're free to go.” Noah smiled over at Vanessa and reached for his crutches before hoisting himself up. “Do you want to go see your mum?” His smile got even bigger at the suggestion.

They slowly walked over to Charity’s ward, mindful that Noah couldn't walk particularly fast.

They approached the waiting room, laughing at Liv who was making fun of Noah on his crutches. Their laughter was quickly halted when they noticed the solemn mood.

“Debbie, what’s going on? I thought everything was okay.” Debbie looked over at Vanessa with nothing but sorrow in her eyes.

“Mum has retrograde amnesia. The doctor said it’s common when people have swelling in the brain. But the last thing she remembers was August of 2017 from what we can gather”

By this point Vanessa’s brain had finally caught up with what Debbie was saying and understood the severity of her words.

“Wait, that was two months before everything happened, she won't remember our relationship at all.” Vanessa forced out. She could feel her legs giving out from under her. Aaron and Robert were quick to be either side of her and slowly helped her to a nearby chair.

“I'm sorry Vanessa”

Vanessa’s world was quickly crumbling around her and there was nothing she could do about it.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you all enjoy the chapter!

_'Round and round like a horse on a carousel, we go,  
Will I catch up to love? I could never tell, I know,  
Chasing after you is like a fairytale, but I,  
Feel like I'm glued on tight to this carousel'_

As quickly as her world was crumbling around her, she was suddenly thrown back into a sense of normality by four little arms wrapping around her legs. She opened her eyes and saw the confused eyes of her boys looking up at her. 

“Hey boys, What are you doing here?” The question was more aimed at Paddy than the boys. The young boys instantly burst into their rendition of events but knowing that there are most likely some majorly overexaggerated details in their versions zones out until they've finished talking.

Once they've finished she looks up at Paddy for a more realistic answer.

“Charity wants to see Moses, but when I mentioned her Johnny decided he wanted to come as well.” 

“What has Charity been told? Has anyone told her about our relationship?”

“Chas told her earlier, she looked on her phone and saw you guys all together as her screensaver so we had to explain” Debbie answered. For the umpteenth time today, Vanessa found herself letting out a heavy breath. 

“Okay erm, I'm going to take the boys in to see her, is Chas still in there with her?” She received a nod from Debbie. She put Moses on her hip and grabbed Johnny’s hand, she gave a quick nod to Noah so he knew to follow along and walked to the room number Debbie had given her. 

“Ness, you're not going to leave us are you” Noah blurted out just before they were about to enter the room. It had taken him a long time to accept that Vanessa wasn't going to leave every time Charity had an issue or breakdown. 

“Of course not Noah. I know that right now you're mum doesn’t remember everything, but I still love her. I’ll do anything not to lose her or you guys. I promise I’ll do everything in my power to keep us all together whilst she can’t remember” Vanessa could see that he was on the edge of tears. She pulled him into a hug, Moses instantly put one of his arms around Noah's neck in a hug and Johnny had attached himself to their legs to join in. 

When they pulled away, Noah had a small smile on his face, which reassured Vanessa that he at least believed what she had told him. 

“Alright let's do this” the short blonde turned to the door and began to push it open, letting Noah hobble in first before walking in herself with the two younger boys. Vanessa suddenly felt very awkward, she didn't know what to do. 

“Oh my god Noah, you're okay” Charity voice was laced with concern. She motioned for Noah to come to sit by her feet. 

“Yeah, Ness came to discharge me and save me from awful hospital food” Noah laughed. 

“You discharged him?” Charity asked, anger present in her tone.

“Erm yeah sorry, I didn't know if you would be able to and he was practically begging to be able to get out of that room.” Vanessa wasn't used to the level of hostility that Charity was showing anymore, it truly was a hit that she didn't expect to hurt as much as it did. 

“Moses, are you gonna go see mummy?” Vanessa asked softly, she knew that when things seemed tense he got very clingy which wasn't normal behaviour for him to exhibit. Moses had his head tucked in the crook of her neck and was really gripping her top. She could see the hurt in Charity’s eyes when it was Vanessa comforting her little buy and not herself. 

Vanessa began trying to prise Moses from her body so she could pass him over to Charity. However, while she was busy with Moses she hadn't noticed that Johnny had made his way over to Charity wanting the same attention from her. Chas was watching the whole thing unfold from a chair sat by the bed unsure of what to do. 

“Chatty, you feeling better?” the young boy looked up at the women sitting in the hospital bed expecting the Charity he knew to answer. 

“Erm yeah, I guess I am kid” Was the response he got, although it was inherently Charity, the young boy clearly noticed the lack of love in her voice. He knew instantly that this wasn't the Charity he knew and that became plainly obvious when he turned to Chas to be picked up and comforted, something he would normally do. 

Vanessa had finally been able to pry Moses off her hip to pass him over to Charity. She placed him gently on the side of the bed. 

“You’ve got to be careful okay, mummy’s managed to hurt her arm, okay?” Vanessa said softly. Moses nodded and gently snuggled into Charity’s side. 

“You’ve grown up a lot, hey Moses.” Charity’s voice was thick with emotions. She’d missed over two years of her little boy's life and she knew she may never get that time back. 

Noah, Charity and Chas all started with a conversation about how he’s been recently and the little bit of trouble he had gotten into in the past year. 

Vanessa felt increasingly awkward stood in the corner of the room not knowing what to do with herself. To Charity this woman was a near stranger, before the kiss they’d only ever interacted when Vanessa was getting drinks. 

After a few minutes, Vanessa got the courage to speak up. 

“Chas, would you mind taking the boys to go get a drink and maybe a snack? I know they’re probably starting to get hungry.” Chas nodded and rounded up the boys before walking out the door, leaving Vanessa and Charity alone in the room for the first time. 

Vanessa decided to sit in the chair that Chas had just left, being sat down was a nice relief for the short blonde as she had been at work since an early hour and had been running around the hospital trying her best to sort everything. 

“Hi” Charity’s voice seemed to echo throughout the room. 

“I’m sorry, this must be weird for you.” 

“You have no idea, one of the last things I remember doing is locking Megan in the cellar and setting up Frank.” Charity admitted sheepishly. After a few moments of uncomfortable Charity brought up the subject neither of them truly knew how to broach. 

“How did this thing between us happen? No offence but the last thing I expected to find on my phone was a picture of the five of us as my screensaver. Also, facial recognition is a crazy thing.” that brought a small smile to Vanessa’s lips, it was almost something that Charity would have said to her on an average day. 

“I’m not sure how much I should be telling you but it was October 2017 and we were at Finn’s wake. I was beyond drunk and you were making digs at Megan, so I stuck my nose in, I made a right fool of myself. In the process of trying to stick up for Megan, I insulted her, you really loved that one. You went down to the cellar to change a barrel. I followed you down there and shut the door behind me. What I didn't know was that the lock was broken. I locked us in.” Charity laughed at that and rolled her eyes. 

“Yeah, you certainly weren’t laughing that night. I tried to call you pathological. I say tried since I could even get through the entire word without you helping me. Anyway, we started drinking. One minute we were talking, next we were kissing. Guess you got me to notice you.” Vanessa laughed to herself remembering how Charity flicked her mask to her face before kissing her. 

Suddenly Charity felt like two live wires were sparking in her head, she could vividly see Vanessa sitting with her in the cellar, she was wearing a yellow mask and a matching cape. They were both looking at each other dead in the eyes, the shorter blondes filled with lust. Flicking the mask against Vanessa’s skin. The words came to her all at once and she had the urge to say them aloud.

“If I want someone to notice me, they notice me” Charity spoke slightly confused at the memory. 

“What did you just say,” Vanessa asked unsure if she was hearing correctly. 

“I think I just remembered the lead up to the kiss. The doctor told me that certain things may trigger my memory and I guess you saying that got me to remember what I had said.” Charity explained. 

“I guess you remembering that is a good sign that you're going to get your memory back eventually though.” Vanessa was trying to remain positive despite feeling like she was falling apart, the last thing Charity needs right now is for Vanessa to have an emotional breakdown. 

“I should probably be getting the boys home soon, it's getting late”

“Wait, we live together?” Charity was truly shocked no one had thought to mention it to her.

“Yeah, I moved in over a year ago” Vanessa replied simply. 

Charity looked like she had a million thoughts swirling around her head, trying to organise the new information she had been given. 

“If you give me a call tomorrow i can come pick you up when you've been released,” Vanessa started to trip over her words at her own suggestion, “Or Chas could come pick you up” She added quickly. 

Charity nodded and watched as the woman, who was her fiance, walked away. She felt a massive pang of guilt at what the poor blonde must be going through. More than anything, she wished she could remember how in love Chas made it sound like they are. So many memories lost, just hopefully not forever.

**Author's Note:**

> I really need a beta, so if anyone would be able to do that for me please let me know! Thank you in advance, you're a life saver!


End file.
